Remembering & Hoping

Growing up as a young girl I remember an uncle coming and visiting us often.  He was my Father's youngest brother and its quite amazing to me how I still remember the silliest things.  His dog, this facial hair, his kind smile, and how he always smelled of cigarettes.  I remember the drive to and from Montreal to my Grandfathers funeral.  He would buy me treats in the gas stations if I didn't tattle on him to my Dad for smoking in the car while my Dad slept.  As I grew older I started to understand that he was a troubled soul who fought many demons.  He would come to my Dad in times of desperation and in times where he needed someone to lean on.  He floated in and out of our lives, always leaving fond memories for me.
As a girl of 12-14 years old, he came back.  This time he wasn't alone and came with a woman who had two young girls.  He had changed, he was in love.  The two girls filled a major part of his heart and their Mother was good for him.  They were married and my parents put on a small little reception for them.  It didn't seem to be too long before he was to become a father for the first time.  A little boy was born and again, he seemed to change.  We all were happy that he had finally been able to stay "clean" and that life was good for him. 

Then it all fell apart. 

His demons returned and his new wife, the two girls, and his pride and joy left his life.  My Dad helped him for a while with the supervised visitation that he had with his son.  My Dad got him yet another job.  Everyone prayed that somehow he would be able to fight and overcome the drugs.  It didn't happen for him and he died a few years back. 

Alone. 

 His body layed alone in his apartment before someone even noticed he wasn't around.  To this day it breaks my heart to think of him, and his son. 
I wonder if my cousin knows just how much his Dad loved him.  Was he old enough to remember the silly things like me?  Does he still see his smile when he closes his eyes?  I have often wanted to contact him, I see his profile on Facebook.  Would it be beneficial to him?  To me?  He was and is still loved by his Dad.  I hope he knows that, I hope his Mother told him.